The story of a boy who loved to walk.
Long ago, a prosperous ancient tribe built a group of dwellings protected by strong walls against the unknowns of the world outside –wildlife, evil spirits, fickle Nature, and other warring tribes. They found safety in numbers and hunted in groups. This was their world. They were content. A young boy wondered if there was more to see beyond the familiar walls and forests.
The tribe’s leader and his parents tried to dissuade him. They shared awful stories of what had happened to those who had dared venture out alone. Undeterred, the boy said he \wanted to explore more. They denied him permission. The voice in his heart spoke. He knew then that he did not have to seek or wait for permission from those who had never stepped beyond those walls. They were living the same lives as their ancestors, fearful of exploring. These were not the people who could teach him anything more.
“Don’t worry so much about ‘not supposed to’.” – Joanne Harris
The boy gave himself permission to overcome his fear. He gave away most of his things to others. He had no use for them anymore. They would inhibit his journey. You won’t survive a day without us, the tribe warned as he stepped outside the gates. He felt no rancor towards them. He was following the voice of his heart. He laughed, waved, and walked away with his spear, never looking back. His dog ran out with him.
A few friends joined him for a while, offering to help him if he stayed on. Besides, did he realize that others would ‘talk’ if he just walked away? He laughed again. Everyone would forget him before the sun set and move on with their own lives, he knew. He hugged his friends, thanked them, and started walking towards the forest. This tribe would stay where it was, but he needed to walk a long way to get to where he was meant to be. Besides, it was the only way he could see and discover new things.
“When you feel it’s time for you to leave, you leave. You neither need to wait to be released, nor ask for permission.” – Beau Taplin
He slept on trees at night, alert to the dangers of the jungle. He was moved to tears by starry skies. He walked beyond the familiar forest. He shed his tribal identity and entered lands owned by other tribes. A few even joined him for long talks over evening fires. The too wondered what lay beyond but were afraid to step out. It wasn’t such a bad life, he assured them. He had found abundance in place of the scarcity his tribe had predicted for him.
A couple of boys from other tribes asked to join him. He shrugged. He wasn’t interested in being a ‘leader’ and pretend to know everything. He had met too many of those. That would inhibit his growth. There was nothing he could teach them. In fact, he was hoping to learn from others. He could, however, point to a few in his old tribe who had been wiser than most even in their limited world. The only thing he knew without doubt was that the voice of his heart never lied. He was following it. He asked them to follow theirs.
To his surprise, they joined him. Together, they discovered new mountains, rivers, and hunting grounds. They invented new hunting weapons and found new ways to cook their food. They discovered deep friendship. They walked on through meadows of exotic flowers, experienced different seasons, and saw animals they had never seen before. Those who joined them were neither welcomed nor asked to leave. Each found his own way to contribute and thrived. One day they reached the ocean and marveled at it. The boy, now a man, felt expansive.
He built a dwelling there because he loved the view. He took from Nature what he needed and never lacked. He loved watching the ocean and its creatures from the shore. He was never bored. This, he felt, was the end of his journey.
“You aren’t waiting for someone to give you permission to live; you’re waiting to get permission from yourself. It’s okay to live the life you want.” – Avina Celeste
Years later, when their families were sitting around a fire and trading stories, a child asked, ‘Have you ever tried to build something that will help us float on this huge water?’ The man gazed at the flickering fire for a long time. The voice in his heart spoke. He looked at the boy. ‘Thank you. I just gave myself permission to do so,’ he replied. The journey, he realized, would never end. There would always be something new to explore but it would only happen if he gave himself permission to be open to possibilities.
This story makes two points: That we spend our lives waiting for or seeking permission from someone else to do things that will make help make our lives better. Yet, we never ask permission from the only person who matters: ourselves. We do not give ourselves permission to overcome our own fears. If we did, we would not wait to seek permission from someone else. We would not spend life blaming others for deterring us from doing things we value.
When we don’t prioritize our well-being, we find it hard to permit ourselves to accept our own flaws and better ourselves. We hardly introspect on what truly matters to us. How can we live a good life when we are ignorant about what matters most to us? We go around in circles, searching for satisfaction through external acquisitions and quick fixes when the answer lies within. We are not willing to permit ourselves to work hard and make the effort to live our best lives.
We set goals with a definite vision of the rewards they will bring us. Most of those rewards are material. Many times, the path is not as we envisioned. There are twists and turns, unexpected events, people, situations, and countless distractions we succumb to. When we do get there, the rewards might not be what we expected them to be.
If you are still wondering why you don’t feel as if you’ve ‘made it’, you know to listen to the voice in your heart and give yourself permission to be open to possibilities. Just for now. And keep on walking till you get to where you need to be. Moment by moment.