Humility needs to be redefined.
The dictionary definition of humility is “a modest or low view of one’s own importance.” This plays into the popular view that more ‘important’ human beings are not necessarily humble. It also seems to imply that those who regard themselves as virtuous or are considered of lower importance as defined by any man-made system need to have a low view of their importance and selves. In other words, implicit obedience because you are not important enough. Have low self-esteem and always know your place. Any wonder why many confuse humility with servility?
People who believe in unquestioning obedience are pointed out as models of humility. “Learn to be like them,” children are told. Conformity, rather than innovation, is encouraged. In other words, you are society’s definition of humility if you follow what others do. Try to merge in without standing out or thinking for yourself. On the other hand, ‘having high self-esteem’ is also encouraged. How confusing! And what a narrow definition of humility!
What then, is humility?
Humility is having the wisdom to understand your strengths and not hesitating to showcase them without feeling the need to put others down. It reflects your secure personality – someone who is willing to accept differing points of view without believing that you are always right. It also reflects a high level of self-awareness to understand that you need not put yourself down to appear ‘humble’.
Humility is not believing that you are an expert because you are familiar with a process. It simply means that you are doing something well enough because you have been handling a similar process or participating in a repetitive event for a long time and building upon it. Practice makes perfect. Familiarity with a process does not qualify as expertise or innovation. If you believe otherwise, you might be suffering from a disease called egotism. Humility is being aware of your many flaws, not being afraid to face them, and growing a little better every day.
Stopping every now and then to listen to those you don’t have to listen to is humility. It is knowing that the best ideas don’t always come from you, regardless of your title or standing in society. It means having a genuinely open mind, considering every idea, and accepting the best one.
Humility is the awareness that you too will need to give way to others who might be better, quicker, and perhaps have far better visions. Regardless of how hard you try to hold onto something. Accepting this and encouraging those with different visions and skills is true humility. “The old order changeth yielding place to new…” You are no exception.
It means standing up for what you believe in. Humility is having the moral courage to raise your voice for what is right and just without being afraid or being a silent bystander because you have something to gain. It is being true to yourself and feeling proud of your choices. It is living your choices with a smile and without regret.
Humility is understanding that life really is short and impermanent. We love to delude ourselves about the true nature of life, believing that it will follow the same pattern for every individual in spite of knowing that it does not. You are not immortal, however hard that is to accept. You can choose to deliberately deceive yourself into thinking that death hovers far away on the horizon, waiting for you to summon it or accept the truth – that it can happen any moment.
How do you want to spend your tenuous, wonderful existence? Would you like to be doing the same thing for years, blissfully ignorant in your comfort zone? Or constantly renew yourself and learn more by stepping out and embracing wider experiences?
Humility is understanding that you are simply another species among many others that inhabit this earth and its waters. It is being conscious of the fact – more than ever before – that you can help other species by the gift of being human instead of destroying them. It is being deeply aware that by destroying other species, we are destroying themselves. Once you know that you can make a difference to the environment as an individual, you will also take accountability for your life choices and their consequences.
In this context, humility is living a needs vs wants life instead of preaching about the climate crisis while still living a life with a giant carbon footprint because you put your convenience above that of all other life on this earth. Humility is walking the talk.
Above all, humility is the realization that you need to leave a meaningful legacy to those who love and respect you. And that this is usually not a material legacy alone.
